Define your relationship (part 1)

Define your relationship(part1)

By Okeke Joshua
Okekejoshua312@gmail.com

Reationship in an essential part in any one life, that can either influence one positively or negatively.There are two important words in the topic which are Define and Relationship. According to the English dictionary, To define means to express the essential nature of something and Relationship means a way in which two or more people behave and are involved with eachother.So when we say define your relationship it means making the essential nature of two people been involved with each other known or expressed.
I noticed that people Don't know the reason why they are into a relationship with someone. Some just go into a relationship for some reasons that isnt worth it.Before someone will be able to define his or her relationship, such a person has to first discover what he or she want.Once you Dont have a choice you tends to settle for anything.
The truth is that most time we know what we want, just that we are afraid to admit that or we lack the courage and discipline to stand by it.That is why I do advice people to be clear on what they want before going into any relationship.I love him and I guess he loves me back is too way too shallow to be a reason why you should be in a relationship with other opposite sex.
So first we need to settle the matter of what we want, then that we help in our selection.Relationship is created for a purpose, that is why it need to be define as to what do I want to get out of this stuff or why am i doing this.Remember an adage says when the purpose of a thing isn't define, then an abuse is inevitable.When your relationship is defined it kind of push you to a success in it cause it is what you want that you would be better able to move towards to. Lets move to the various reason why a relationship need to be defined:
1. It gives you a sense of direction: When your relationship is been defined, it kind of give a likely way to where it is heading to. In the sense that it gives you a reason to be in such a relationship, with such a sense of direction it gives your relationship a meaning. As far a relationship is fulfilling its purpose( which are the things you desire) it is meaningful, that is, it worth your time.
2. It helps you not to just accept or settle for just anything: Most people just accept anything that is brought to their table of relationship cause they Dont have anything or purpose to achieve from it.When someone goes into a relationship just for fun or because their mates are in one, they tend to just follow with any tune that comes along cause they have low sense of objection.A relationship that is not adding value to you doesn't worth your time. I have a friend of mine , we call in Philz in school. We were discussing and he said to me that "josh I can be with a lady that for at least a five minutes talk we can't talk of something meaning rather the buy me something syndrome most girls have this days".So for someone like him if the Lady isn't someone with a great mind then there is no need of being on anything serious with her. That is how having a relationship defined or a purpose for a relationship known helps.
3. It serves a red signal for you to back off: Like I said once a relationship isn't fulfilling its purpose you want is a signal for you to back off. If you are in a relationship with someone, and your stand is no sex until marriage which is very right,then your partner all of a suddenly begins to be too demanding for sex, my sister your purpose already define that to you as a red flag to back off with immediate effect.The problem is that people Dont understand that every relationship is meant for a break up except marriage. Once you have that in mind, when your relationship is making you lose your value or purpose, then it makes it easier to back off. So even if he his giving you lies that it is only the head that he will insert as I discoverd recently on my research on the lies men do tell, your purpose mind will already let that being know to you that the relationship is already shifting from what you originally wanted which is fulfillment of purpose.
It is only when you are confuse and unsure that you settle for anything you Dont want.Take a few days or even weeks to get it clear of what you really want and stand by it.Have a standard, and Dont let anyone belittle it for you
I see people make some mistakes cause the have no standard.
The guy will ask then to take some nasty step, and because of no principle they fall to just anything he tell them cause they Dont wat to offend him or lose him.He will tell some send me your nude pics and the lady will do that, funny enough she will ask him to delete it after she sent it.Lolz.The guy will just send them all to a locker app and tell them that he has deleted it. And later he will use that to blackmail her.
Anyone with no sense of drive tends to be driven to any kind of direction.

God bless you.
Part Two of this study coming soon
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Steps to achieving greatness

Steps to achieving Greatness
Written by Okeke Joshua
Okekejoshua312@gmail.com

During a Sunday service in church while my pastor's wife was giving a message from 2kings 7, I got this inspiration that I will love to share.
Greatness According to the urban dictionary is defined as an acquisition of status by the people who have contributed to an organization, group or purpose that is greater than themselves. Until what you do is beyond your capacity on a ordinary level then you haven't achieve greatness. The whole 2kings 7 tells us about four lepers whose great actions saved a nation. I was going through this chapter over and over again I discovered seven(7) steps that this lepers took or had on their side that lead them to such greatness or achievement.
1. Discover a Need: The first step to greatness is to discover a need and try to meet it. We live in an economy that once you discover a need and you are ready to fix it then you are on the path way to success. The lepers discovered that there was no food anymore in Samaria in vs4 and they decided to take a step on that.
2. Have a positivity mind: Most people just stop at discovering a need or having a vision, but they aren't ready to believe that vision is achieveable. A person with a positivity mind is ready to dare what looks impossible. They are risks takers. The lepers had a positive mind that there is a possibility of them been alive.
3. Surround yourself with great mind: There is need to have people of like mind around you, they will serve as encouragement for you when your hope is getting weak. I was just imaging that if it was only one leper there might not be much courage to take such step.
4. There is always possibility of failure: Once you have this in mind, then you will know that you failing isn't the end of everything but a discovery of the various ways not to go about something. The man that made electric bulb made several mistakes or failures before he achieve what he wanted to achieve.
5. Maximize every opportunity: Any opportunity that comes your way of greatness use it wisely for an example as a student, scholarship can be an opportunity for your greatness. The lepers discovered that the camp of their enemies was full of many thing, they got all the materials that they needed for themselves.
6. Let your greatness impact others: Your greatness must Be able to touch lives positively. The lepers discovered that only them enjoying that achievement was wrong.It was that understanding that made them to tell the kings men about what has happened. So It means that your greatness isn't complete until it affects lifes positively.
7. God's Factor: To crown it all God is the utimate source of greatness. It was God that made the feet of the lepers sounded like chariots of war in the hears of the enemies. God bless the work and faith they had. Start something then God will have something to act on for your sake.
In conclusion, I will say your present condition or state isn't a determinate of how far you can achieve. According to my mentor Pastor sam Adeyemi he said "take action and unforeseen forces will aid you." Dare the impossible.
God bless you.

Tame me now, or i tame you later

Tame Me Now, Or I Tame You Later
Biblical Steps On Controlling Anger
By Okeke Joshua
Okekejoshua312@gmail.com

Anger according to the English dictionary means a strong feeling of displeasure, hostility nor antagonism toward someone or something, usually combined with an urge to harm. The English dictionary explains anger well. Anger is a natural thing and everyone gets angry. The bible says in Ephesians 4:26a " In your anger, do not sin", meaning that God knows that anger is in the human nature. The passage went on saying that "do not sin" meaning that anger can be abnormal when you allows it to control you to sining. That is what makes anger simply unhealthy. Allowing this anger to control us ends us doing unrighteous things which are against God's desire(James 1:20).
Anger is fully capable of destroying our relationship with God and other people around us(2 kings17:18). God decided to remove the people of isreal from his presence and leaving only the people of judah. An hot tempered person who lacks the ability to control himself end up making things worse than before and ends up regretting it. Lets look at this few steps on how to tame anger.
God's Help:- The position of God can not be over emphasize on this matter. An hot tempered person needs the help of God to be able be able to tame anger. Remember that by strength shall no man prevail. There is always limit to the ability of man. When we let God know that we are done with letting anger control at that point of releasing all to him, he give us grace to overcome it.
Control your words:- The words we speak after being provoked goes along way in telling the next line of action that will take place. The bible says that a gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger(proverbs 15:1). The words we speak matter a lot.
Act wisely and maturely:- There are times one would just have to remain silent. Some do believe that being silent is an act of being foolish which is not. It is rather in that situation a sign that you have wisdom and you are matured. The ability to look over some certain issues and not making issues from it shows that you are wiser and it add great honour to you( proverbs 19:11).
Break the Association:- Breaking of friendship with hot tempered person will also help. Also getting rid of things that propels anger such as malice and the likes (colossians 3:8). When all this are far from your dwelling it makes controlling anger easier.
Patience:- The little patience you exercise to think of your next word would greatly help in controlling anger. The ability to think of the next person reaction matter alot. We are being asked to treat others the way we want to be treated( luke 6:31). Bearing this in mind will help us express our anger in the right manner.
Be Angry:- I know that this may sound somehow but it is the truth. There are times you need to be angry and there are times you need not to. The way you express your angry is what matter alot. The bible says "be angry and yet do not sin" .
In conclusion, all this steps can only be fully achieved under the grace of God. Like the chrous of an hymn says " Ask the saviour to help you, comfort strengthen and keep you, he is willing to aid you, he will carry you through" It is only God that bring Deliverance.
God bless you

Healthy communication for a healthy relationship

By Okeke Joshua
Communication according to the English dictionary is defined as "the concept or state of exchanging data or information between entities". Communication is knowing what to say or express, how to say or express it and when to say or express it - Okeke Joshua.All said well on communication. Communication goes a long way in telling how far a relationship will go. Once you feed your relationship with the right things it would be so interesting. With communication a relationship is established or exist but with healthy communication it lasts -Okeke Joshua. Our personal communication with God is very essential for every Godly Relationship we are in.Here are some tip for an healthy communication for a healthy relationship:
Be swift to hear and slow o speak:- This affects majority of relationships we have today. The ability to listen when the other party or person is speaking and to think before speaking goes a long way in establishing a steady communication hereby building a better and healthier relationship.
Don`t use foul languages:- Abusive words are a treat to any relationship. In many homes we see husbands and wives exchanging abusive words to each other, and this would just bring disrespect and the likes. Rather let our words make people than mar them (colossians 3:8;4:6).
Always be ready to do and learn new things:- Stop sticking to one particular way of doing things. Repeating the same pattern or doing the same thing at all times make relationship sour and communication weak. Trying a new approach do work most times(proverb 16:23).
Being faithful:- Being faithful in a relationship always go a long way in establishing a good communication and a healthy relationship. Cheating brings distrust and weaken communication(proverbs 13:17).
Speaking the truth:- Being truthful always helps in establishing trust which is an essential ingredient for a healthy relationship(proverbs 12:17).
Understanding:- The ability to understand your partner is a sign of maturity and also strengthen your relationship. Understanding makes communication easy and steady.
In conclusion, if all this tips are been fully used then there is noting stopping you from having a healthy communication in your relationship.
God bless you.

OkekeJoshua312@gmail.com

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